clarity brings pain?....
I have been noticing something lately. Clarity, or observation of reality makes me angry or wanna cry. I see the video tonight on the news of cows to sick to walk being pushed by a fork lift into a pen to be slaughtered, this is inrefernece to a beef recall. It makes me feel like shit eating beef... but, I love meat. This is brutality though. I WISH that if I wanted to eat meat I HAD to hunt it and kill it myself, and not with a gun, a spear or a sword. Laugh all ya want, but at least then I would feel like I deserved it.
Then there is work.... I look around and and get pissed. I am not that smart, got me a GED while I was in juvenile detention. I am also too emotional, and unstable. Even though I have these 'features' I see things by people that are supposedly my betters that makes me want to lash out. People at my company bitch constantly about the place. You know what? fuck you. This company has treated us well. It takes people who have no fucking hope of doing anuthing but flip burgers, sell drugs, or some other such activity and it gives em a chance. Yup they do. AOL's best feature is that. Sure it is fucked up, but go to another company and see what they offer you. Most of these people in their defense have never worked anywhere else really, so they do not have perspective.
I look at this place and I see that we need to cut ALOT. If we work smarter, use the right technologies, we can eliminate at least 2/3's of operations and dev. This is not something you do right away. You do this over time. Some people will think this is wrong, and it will ruin peoples lives. Well... this place offers us free college, yup 100% tuition re-imbursement, AND more technical training than you can imagine, oh and you get paid to go to that. We need to work smarter, use more open technology, Puppet, Cobbler, Nagios, etc. This might sound vicious, but remember, when you work at a comany, you are ther to make money for them. Its a business. Automate dammit.
I am blessed. I get to get up go to my job, either on a bike I never though I could afford or in my Audi. WTF, I never graduated, was a stupid lazy drug dealing kid. I woke up, but I did not sell out, buy in, or 'grow up' I think I have become. There is another person I know who is blessed, and I think he is a complete and utter fucktard.
***** CENSORED BY THE POWERS THAT BE *****
Anyway, I ramble on. I see these things and I hurt and I wonder. Then I go ride my bike.
Peace
Then there is work.... I look around and and get pissed. I am not that smart, got me a GED while I was in juvenile detention. I am also too emotional, and unstable. Even though I have these 'features' I see things by people that are supposedly my betters that makes me want to lash out. People at my company bitch constantly about the place. You know what? fuck you. This company has treated us well. It takes people who have no fucking hope of doing anuthing but flip burgers, sell drugs, or some other such activity and it gives em a chance. Yup they do. AOL's best feature is that. Sure it is fucked up, but go to another company and see what they offer you. Most of these people in their defense have never worked anywhere else really, so they do not have perspective.
I look at this place and I see that we need to cut ALOT. If we work smarter, use the right technologies, we can eliminate at least 2/3's of operations and dev. This is not something you do right away. You do this over time. Some people will think this is wrong, and it will ruin peoples lives. Well... this place offers us free college, yup 100% tuition re-imbursement, AND more technical training than you can imagine, oh and you get paid to go to that. We need to work smarter, use more open technology, Puppet, Cobbler, Nagios, etc. This might sound vicious, but remember, when you work at a comany, you are ther to make money for them. Its a business. Automate dammit.
I am blessed. I get to get up go to my job, either on a bike I never though I could afford or in my Audi. WTF, I never graduated, was a stupid lazy drug dealing kid. I woke up, but I did not sell out, buy in, or 'grow up' I think I have become. There is another person I know who is blessed, and I think he is a complete and utter fucktard.
***** CENSORED BY THE POWERS THAT BE *****
Anyway, I ramble on. I see these things and I hurt and I wonder. Then I go ride my bike.
Peace
posted by jim at
10:32 PM
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